A homeless man finds a shiny lamp by the road while trying to find a place to pass the night. They do however see Tarzan painting zebras.

One liner tags: life, time, work. So far, he had already mastered his ABC’s and could count to one hundred perfectly. “Sister Mary Katherine!" The go to Africa and see lions and giraffes etc. I've never sold alcohol to a nun in me life!" He thinks nothing of it, and finishes his day. Check out all the joints". A group of biologists get to gether to find some bird.

I spent years and years learning Latin, Spanish, Mandarin, and Swahili but it turns out I just misheard my uncle when I though he told me "girls love a cunning linguist". full disclosure, this isn't my joke, was sent to me. Ask they are smoking, it begins to rain. If you are arguing with your sex partner then you are wasting your fucking time. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. When he gets to the afterlife, he finds himself at the back of a miles-long line to get into Heaven. After seven years of training in the medical fields and hard work, a very good friend of mine was fired after one minor indiscretion. Seems like a waste of time in my opinion. So, he opens the box and picks up the letter. As he orders a beer he sees a jar filled with 100$ bills on the counter. One of the comedians says, “Five!” And they all burst out laughing. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. That's the worst length to punchline ratio I've ever herd. Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. As the night prolongs, he notices little by little the bar begins to empty. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

Well, the boy finally graduated from preschool. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. What are some long jokes that wastes people's time? Full of tourists.

He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.

So a man decides to try out a new restaurant on his lunch break and decides to order the soup. They go back the next year and find roughly the same thing. There's absolutely *no* information about twisted ankles or skinned knees! A small-town parish priest realizes that he is getting too old to ring the bell in the tower and advertises for a bell ringer.

They're simply not worth ittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt, A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer were in a hotel for a convention. ", Brad's first year away at university was a lot of partying and paying for his friend's. The scientist asks the farmer, "What is the distance from earth to the moon?" Another said, "no, it was an electrical engineer. The monkey says "Smoking a joint. This joke has probably been posted in here before, but what the hell, it’s my favorite. Why do the French eat snails? not like this not like this !! The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." He glances at it briefly to make sure it is stamped, and then puts it in his bag with his other letters. Three Highschool Sr's decided to blow off their final exam for their logic class, and spend the day getting wasted. Remember at school when you pretended to be interested in a teachers social life just to waste time during lessons A genuinely nice guy and an absolutely brilliant mortician. "Look at the nervous system! Bragging About Son Joke. He still wouldn't tell me why he crossed the road. A professional gambler wins big and dies of an aneurysm. I spent years and years learning Latin, Spanish, Mandarin, and Swahili but it turns out I just misheard my uncle when I though he told me "girls love a cunning linguist". One day a dad comes home from work, with anew robot he's been working on. I'm just curious as to whether or not there are any other jokes like it out there. There will be no more assholes in the world. Preferably long ones as is obvious by the title (I thrive on the misery of others). I fear I've wasted my life. The sheriff figures even a short stay in jail will be plenty after a little “justice” from the townspeople. “Clocks slay time... time is dead as long as it is being clicked off by little wheels; only when the clock stops does time come to life.” ― William Faulkner, The Sound and … He was hands down the weirdest teacher I’ve ever had. Complete waste of money. If you are into long jokes, we have collected enough to keep you guffawing and clutching your stomach for a very long time. share. I wasted my life. All I do for eight hours a day is make shit posts. He looks at them and shrugs saying "Tarzan stripes forever" (stars and stripes forever). 82.95 % / 1193 votes. "I should be in charge," said the brain , "Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen. 1. I think it’s a waste of space. Press J to jump to the feed. Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "What? The kind I'm looking for generally end with a pun or a clever play on words. / not like this!<, A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. After a couple of weeks alone, he figures 'what the heck...' and drops his trousers behind his camel and proceed.

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